First presented by the Open Theatre at the Sheridan Square Playhouse, NYC, 1964-65 on successive Monday nights, directed by Sydney Schubert Walter, with Joyce Aaron. One of the pair of "Doris Day" plays.

ROSSANO: May I say something to you very personal?

DORIS: Not too personal, I hope.

ROSSANO: Something I am feeling.

Doris: Yes?

ROSSANO: Your eyes.

DORIS: My eyes?

ROSSANO: You have eyes the same color my mother was.

DORIS: What color was that?

ROSSANO: My mother was blue, blue like you.

DORIS: Oh, I don’t know what to say.

ROSSANO: Say nothing. Say nothing my darling

   (He leans over to kiss her. She allows a small kiss.)

DORIS: Oh, Rossano, there’s something I’d like to show you.

ROSSANO: What is that?

DORIS: Would you walk to the other side of the room?

ROSSANO: The other side of the room? Away from you? But why? Is it an America custom?

DORIS (coyly): You’ll see.

ROSSANO: Well, if you insist. What else should I do? Hold my hands over my head?

DORIS: You may hold your nose if you want. Some people prefer not to.

(He does. She turns her ass to him and to the audience, tilts it coyly, and farts a long thin fart. Then she looks to him to see how he likes it.)

Well, what do you think?

ROSSANO: Very, very nice.

DORIS: I’m glad you liked it.

Published in America Hurrah and Other Plays (Grove Press) and in War and Four Other Plays by Jean-Claude van Itallie, Dramatists Play Service, (acting edition). Anthology:

The New Underground Theatre, ed. Robert J. Schroeder, Bantam 1968.